Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Sitting on the Throne

You know what the most peaceful and quiet time of your day is? I’m a busy guy, and I figure most of you are too. Life is always kind of a breeze, just blowing and blowing, never quite taking a break. Until you have to stop and release bodily waste. To me, that’s the most peaceful and quiet time of the day. When you can finally pull down your pants, or undress completely if you must, and just sit on your throne. When I say quiet, I am referring to the quiet in your thoughts, because let’s face it, not everybody is quiet when they’re going to work. Some people don’t appreciate that bit of me time. Some people go to the washroom, and are out within 4 minutes. Like, how did you even have time to do your business, then wipe and wash your hands thoroughly?
Some people like to think in the shower, I think on the toilet. Technically, that’s a hipster mentality. It’s quite a great place to think. And a great invention as well. I give props to whoever invented the 8th wonder known as the toilet. Some people complain about not having enough time to themselves. Well there’s your time. Learn to take advantage of it. You can even get a lot of reading and studying done in the washroom. I mean, there’s nothing else to distract you. Just don’t bring your phone in as well, and before you know it, you just finished reviewing a quarter of your psychology exam.  So next time you try to rush your shit, take advantage of your shit, because that shit should be relaxing. As the waste goes, so does your problems.

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